Alright, I’m not ALWAYS a jerk, but honestly. I’ve been a jerk. Here and there…sometimes just a little, sometimes pedal to the metal ram you into the sidewall jerkiness. I’ve been searching for my “center” (I feel all namaste when I say that). But really, between heading to church on Sundays, spending more time with my family & close friends, and starting to get my life organized, I’m getting small tastes of this thing they call happiness. You know good ol’ make you smile and even call your mother happiness.
It’s a funny thing this happiness, it makes you want to be better. So I’ve been reading a bit more. My most recent book of choice is, The Five Dysfunctions of a Team: A Leadership Fable by Patrick Lencioni. Wholly Crap. Everything is starting to make sense. Not only am I recognizing my dysfunctions that may be causing the team to falter, but I’m seeing the dysfunctions in others. I finally feel like I can see the light at the end of the tunnel when it comes to areas of my career. This is exuberating. Like go and eat unlimited Chips & Queso with a gallon of Diet Coke even if it means I’m bloated for 6 days and have to wear my stretchy shoes exuberating!
Don’t get me wrong, I’m still a jerk at times, but who isn’t! Have you driven anywhere lately? I’m just saying that taking the time to start to really invest in myself has really opened up a new perspective for me. This is a big step considering I haven’t watched anything on TV above a G rating in almost a week and a half and my form of cardio today was maneuvering through a minefield of Legos and Thomas the Train for the 15th time trying to get Timothy to stay in bed.
He’s finally asleep, my husband is watching Netflix on the iPad and I’m ready to crash out, Suburban Bliss at it’s finest.
I don’t know about you, but when I was growing up in the small town of Grafton, North Dakota, we used the word coffee as a verb. You didn’t go to visit, you went to coffee. This inevitably meant cups of coffee around a dining room or kitchen table and chatter about everything in the county.
Today’s noun as a verb is ADULT. eg. I don’t want to ADULT today. ha! right!? not Adult’ing to me is napping…I mean what ‘adult’ is expected to nap?! But Adult is much more than that. It’s bills, responsibilities, errands..you know the crap you never really want to do. I did that today. The crap I never want to do. Oddly in the end, I feel really well accomplished. I even read a few excerpts out of my motivational positive thinking books!
I wish I could clear off the entire fridge and just place that magnet of amazingness on my list of ADULTNESS from today! Have the heavens open up with an angelic light that says, SHE DID SOMETHING!
But I didn’t. And it didn’t. And there is still laundry to fold.
In the words of another mom tonight, “OH MYLANTA”. It’s been so ding danged long since I’ve posted on this site. I feel like I should rename it Won’t Post Ever. ugh. But tonight, I’m waiting for my husband’s pants to dry before I hit the sheets so here I am.
Timothy just turned 3 on Friday and we even threw together a last minute dinner with Family tonight. My In-laws were here, as were my two best friends and the best neighbors we could ask for. My mom was unable to make it, and it felt empty without her. Maybe that’s why, as we were getting the house ready today, I started to feel guilty that I didn’t plan a big party; no balloons, no theme, no big cake. It was just a dinner.
Well, let’s just say the “Free Printables” I found on Pinterest and my trusty printer came to the rescue. We still didn’t have a theme, but I did print off a Curious George Party Hat and a couple little things to make it a little more festive. We had a cupcake with 3 candles and I pulled out the table cloths from last year’s birthday. To top it all off, I still had balloons from last birthday as well, and working in radio, we always have helium at the ready, so I ran into work to blow up a couple balloons. BOOM. we’ve got a “party”
It wasn’t much, it didn’t all match and no I didn’t make the salads from scratch, but it was great company and Timothy was so tired in the end that I thought he’d be sleeping with his cupcake rather than eating it.
I don’t know why we get so caught up in everything being “good enough” for our children. I mean “good enough” is 100% in the eye of the beholder. There were no invites, no goodie bags, no running like crazy to coordinate, just family and friends and laughs. Honestly, I think that’s more than enough.