Update Schmupt-date

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I could give you some “oh man it’s been forever..I’m really going to get better about this blog” bullshit.  But I won’t.

I could tell you all the amazing things that have happened to me, my family and friends over the last year.  But I won’t.

I could tell you all the hardships, failures and seemingly motivational “only way to go but up” happenings of last year.  But I won’t.

Nope.  Moving forward I’m just going to post what’s up currently.

If ya like it, give it a “like” and a follow.  

If you REALLY like it, share this blog, baby.

If you don’t, well. fine.  don’t blame me. You read it.

and now…the musings of a Powerlifting Mom who babbles on the radio for a living in 3…..2……..

Fixing my Marriage…and self …one Pinterest project at a time.

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Finding my path to health and wellness has not come easy to me.  I can see, plain as day, what I need to do, but the motivation to do so, is another ordeal entirely.

Stress from work, home, family, money, blah blah blah…has really put a damper on my spirit as of late and I’m looking for outlets to bring back my vigor, my creative, fun nature and my drive.  I may have found it.

Charlie working 1My husband and I have started “projects”.  The kind of projects that either fill our house, are gifted to others, or sold for a little extra cash.  There is something lively and electric about the search for the perfect pieces to our masterpieces.  Sometimes it’s a simple drive to the Home Depot or Thrift Store, other times it a 30 min drive to get wooden pallets from a friends farm.  It’s always an adventure and always a challenge.

When we get the products, it about how we can do it better than the last time, improve it, get MORE creative and Charlie and I just gel during these!

Projects_workingWe get so caught up in our crazy lives that Charlie and I tend to nit-pick at each other for the dumbest things.  When we are creating together, however, it’s like a new spark, a new journey and it’s so refreshing.  It’s like craft time for adults!

Someday, we’ll teach Timothy how to use the saws, hammers and more to create for himself, but for now, Pinterest has become the catalyst to our “date nights” and I’m so grateful!

Chalkboard_joy to the world Chalkboard_joy wreath Chalkboard_little things
Pallet Art_Framed Monograms winerack_1 winerack_2

 

Week 1: Treadmills, Coffee and an iPhone 6.

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Consistency, Passion and the luxury of a schedule change have been on my side this week.  My first full week back at the gym and clean eating and I’m already seeing some great results.  I may seem a bit obsessive about workouts, eating, journaling and more, but it’s what is keeping me going.

I started the week late for a session, no diary written down and just a mess.  I had the desire, but apparently not the organization.  After 6 pages of “this is not how you succeed” in text messeges from my trainer, and a rearrangement of my schedule I was finally set up for success.  Now it was totally in my court.

I weighed in on Monday and by my Thursday session, I weighed in at a 2.6 lb loss.  This is great, now just to keep it off, if not make that number larger for a full week weigh-in this monday.  I’m still arguing with my trainer about coffee with creamer and the carbs that follow suit.  Still sippin’ my joe. but looking for a good creamer alternative.

My iPhone 4s took a total dump when I updated to ios 8.0..which i think in the long run became a blessing in disguise.  The iPhone 6 with My Fitness Pal is the best ever.  I really like this app. It connects with my trainer and other friends that use it  Plus, the camera on the iPhone 6 is the bomb dot com. You can quote me on that.

 

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1/2 of today's prep #cleaneating #syntha-6 #eattrainlose

A post shared by Brook Stephens (@babsinradioland) on

 

Help, Please. The Toughest Phrase in the English Language.

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IMG_4481I’ve been spiraling downward for months now.  Deluding myself into thinking that i’m just fine. I’m just happy. I’m in control of my weight, of my eating, of my thinking.

Nope.

Not so much.

I made the call.

It was a sunny day.  A Friday.  I was driving with the windows down, the radio up and a strange feeling of ambition.

Sitting at a stoplight, I picked up my phone and dialed.

It rang. Three times it rang.

“Hey Brook!” Ben, my trainer, answered with a smile.

I took a deep breath, let all the pride, anger, hurt and self-loathing free.  I was ready to admit it.

“I need help.”

 

And so a new journey begins….

Use Oils they say…Will keep Bugs Away they say…

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I’m not going to knock essential oils…but, I’m going to knock essential oils.  I’m a beginner in the EO universe with no desire to be She-Ra Princess of Oil Power.  I will not be found toting 6 kids in a minivan all doused with pachouli or any other cleansing oil while carrying business cards and samples in a fanny pack.  I won’t. I simply won’t.

EO’s have done some serious wonders for me, my seasonal allergies and even some healing. I get my EO’s from a good friend who knows, I’m not in it for the business, I’m in it for the decrease in water retention and the ability to sleep like a baby in a lavender cloud.

Tonight I made the mistake of “googling” what oils to use to repell mosquitos. Insert 8,000 beyond-passionate EO fanatics with THE answer.

So tonight I had a date with Relaxation: a beautiful clear sky this evening, baby in bed, dusk, candles lit, cup of hot coffee, my ipad and…

10,000 blood sucking fiends.

So, I douse my fave scarf with a combo of lavender, Tea tree Oil and Peppermint. Three oils I had on hand that were touted as AMAZINGLY Effective options for repellent.  I sit down, open Pinterest and realize that my 10,000 new found friends already pinned a cute sign made from pallets that read “Buffet – All You Can Eat”.  It was a massacre.  I could almost hear the laughter of crazy oil ladies zipping up their fanny packs.

So, now I’m covered in Benedryl, listening to my husband tell me I didn’t pay my parking tickets again. Followed by the “Why are you getting parking tickets anyway” conversation.

So much for a nice calm relaxing evening on the deck.  I smell like a custom tube of Aspercreme and I’m itchy.

But my seasonal allergies are at bay and I just started watching another episode of Orange is the New Black on Netflix. So everything is right in my world.

Hamster Wheels, Bug Bites & Co-pays

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Let’s keep this simple:

Hamster Wheel:  Yup, that is my “healthy lifestyle”.  A Hamster wheel.  Stuck in a perpetual “Start over”.  I should maybe re-identify this part of my life as the blue screen of death…everytime I reboot my decision to get healthy and lose the weight, the Blue Screen of Death (Aka negative thoughts, feelings, eatings and bad daytime TV Shows) hits me BAM!  then…you got it . Restart.

Bug Bites:  Yup. This one’s pretty simple.  Might be a tick bite, might be an allergic reaction to a mosquito.  Might even be a spider bite.  The doctor doesn’t know, but I’m supposed to warm compress it and see what comes of it.  If Sigorney Weaver comes a knockin’, we’re all screwed.

Co-Pays:  To top off that little healthy nugget, T-bone has an ear infection.  Poor little man.  However, earache or not, he still rocked counting from 1 to 10 today.  Although, I don’t think he understood what it meant since he followed it up with “The End” and a whole bunch of gibberish.

I’m THAT neighbor:  Suburbia has grabbed me and pretty much slapped the shiz outta me with the Green Thumb Bug.  yup. The Green Thumb Bug. It exists.  Don’t deny it.  Some people choose a cactus in their bathroom, I chose a deck covered in pots with little seeds planted.  These shall be my new children.  Lettuce, Spinach, Arugula, Cilantro, Basil, Parsely and flowers.  They just started sprouting and I was so excited that I hadn’t killed them all off I shouted, “Look at all my children!!!” while my face was inches from some of the soil.  When I looked up, two of my neighbors were staring and started backing into their house.  Great. I’m THAT neighbor.

 

You Say Easter…I Say Heartburn.

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Lordy lordy lordy was Easter amazing today. Great time with family and friends but that’s not all.  Easter brunch today turned out FABOOSH!  The Arugula Salad was amazing (even if I had to sub nectarines since evidently all apricots are being held hostage somewhere) plus the corned beef hash was exactly what the doctor ordered.  Add in a Colorado Bulldog, and umpteen extra calories and sheer foodie richness and we’ve got ourselves an acidic ticking time bomb.Corned Beef Hash It was so good..and I am SO paying for it.  I’m eating rolaids like it’s my job. Isagenix Cleanse tomorrow.  It will be my first. I want to apologize to anyone I my come in contact with tomorrow. I will be going through the Gruyere Shakes and the Chocolate tort DTs.

Falling Down and NOT Running Away

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Sometimes things happen.  Sometimes things are Life. Other times things aren’t things. They are just one thing.  They are just one letter; I

Work didn’t tell me to skip the gym.  My son didn’t tell me to eat pizza instead of the lunch I brought.  My husband definitely didn’t tell me to skip doing work and play games on my iphone.  Nope.

What we have here is a failure to commit.  But why?

Ok, let’s rewind about two months:

I’m gung ho! I’m rarin’ to go!  I’ve got my supplements.  I’ve shopped.  My training sessions are scheduled.

One day gets stressful and I seek the typical head in the sand escape.  I cancel on Ben at Rejuv.  I don’t eat my lunch or really anything at all.  I’m running late and blame the world.

I’m afraid.  I don’t know why.  I’m totally fearless with so many things, but when it comes to weight loss and commitment to myself, I run scared and it takes me weeks to figure out that I’m running.

Then it’s the lunch lady sized ladle of steaming hot self guilt.  “Will they just shake their heads at me?”  “Will they think less of me?”  “Am I a total failure?”  “Who have I let down now?”  “How can I hide my total embarassment and self pity from everyone, they can’t see me like this!”

I work in a career where my life is in the open for all to see.  Sometimes I have to appear super happy even when I’m not.  I have to be the life of the party.  90% of the time, I am happy and ready to party, but there’s that 10% of the time that I question if people will not like me as much if they only knew that I fall down on the road to progress alot. This is where negative self talk destroys me.

This has been a pattern in my life for years.  Back in college, I was a Computer Science Major.  I loved learning code, JAVA, C++, etc.  However, even though I was good at it, I was even better at correcting other people’s incorrect coding.  This is just like my weight loss journey.

I know what to do.  I can even help others on their road.  I have the answers.  I just can’t seem to execute them for myself. The only thing I can think of is that by helping others, I’m not committing to anything. I’m just swooping in and doing what I love in short bursts.

Weight loss for me can’t be a hobby. It can’t be an every now and then thing.  I need to keep my head out of the sand and make this a career.  I know that I can do this. I did it before I had Timothy. Losing the weight after baby?  So much harder mentally.  I’m strongly thinking of joining the weekly support group at Rejuv Medical calling “Breaking Barriers”.  It might be just what I need to finally COMMIT to this LIFESTYLE of health.

Week 2 Weigh In: Sh!t Just Got Real

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JustGotRealAlright, it’s week two and Weigh-In time.  After 7 days, 3 hardcore workouts, 1 extra cardio session and clean eating…oh and I may have eaten a corn dog and a PB&J (not at the same time)…

The Official Weigh-In:

Week 1: (Starting Weight)

Week 2:  -4.2 lbs

 

First Goal:  Lose 10 Lbs for Trip to Nashville:  19 Days to go  5.8 lbs to go