Help, Please. The Toughest Phrase in the English Language.


IMG_4481I’ve been spiraling downward for months now.  Deluding myself into thinking that i’m just fine. I’m just happy. I’m in control of my weight, of my eating, of my thinking.


Not so much.

I made the call.

It was a sunny day.  A Friday.  I was driving with the windows down, the radio up and a strange feeling of ambition.

Sitting at a stoplight, I picked up my phone and dialed.

It rang. Three times it rang.

“Hey Brook!” Ben, my trainer, answered with a smile.

I took a deep breath, let all the pride, anger, hurt and self-loathing free.  I was ready to admit it.

“I need help.”


And so a new journey begins….


Everything Happens for a Reason


Whenever I hear this…”Everything Happens for a Reason”…it’s usually because someone has fallen victim to the most popular girl in school named, Karma.

It’s pretty rare that we hear it when positive things happen.  But what if it’s happening in a perfect yingyang of BOTH.  That’s what’s going on with me right now.  For every Amazing Moment, is a heartbreaking one.  For every smart decision, a completely idiotic decision comes back to bite me in the ass.

I got a message from my trainer that I’m going to die before my son turns 10 and will lose a foot to diabetes due to my lack of concentration on my weight loss.  yeah. Clinically and in the eyes of the Abercrombie shopper, I’m obese. However, for the record, I’m not Diabetic, My feet are fine besides needing a pedi BADLY and I’ve got 8 million other things to worry about right now in my personal and worklife.

So as I sit on my pity pot and look around at what everyone else is doing it makes me think…Geez, I wonder if they are going through the exact same kind of crazy life whirlwinds and decisions that I am right now?  I bet they need a hug too.  I know I do.  It’s a little weird to hug a stranger. Might even get you arrested.  But do you know what isn’t?

Positive Energy.  Smile at them.  Say wonderful things not just to others, but to yourself.  When we look back at the positive, I would almost bet that there will be minimal bad decisions and experiences.  Instead, empowering moments for all those involved.